Seek First

I like to ponder things. I usually find myself pondering insignificant matters and unanswerable questions. There are, however, the very rare moments when I actually ponder something that is relevant, insightful, and applicable to my life. January 2009 has been full of such epiphanies. In the wake of my annual endeavor to make myself a better person (aka new years), I have become very aware of just how short I fall of God's standard for my life. In my last post, I wrote about my desire to keep my perspective fixed around Christ. As I sought to make this desire a reality, reality itself became my biggest obstacle. How could I ignore the huge question marks that seem to dominate my 2009 calendar? How would I overcome my frustrations with the people around me? Do I really expect my problems to be solved by simply adopting a more spiritual perspective on life?

These questions, among others, led me back to one of my favorite verses: Matthew 6:33. "But seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." What does it mean to really seek God first? This is something I have agreed with in principle for my entire life, but only recently have I been pursuing it. I began to realize all the other things that are important to me, and how frequently I am seeking those things before I seek God. The approval of others, my own comfort, sleep; to list only a few. I am learning the importance of Hebrews 12, to "fix our eyes on Jesus, throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and run with endurance the race marked out for us." As I've practiced throwing off everything, I've experienced such a renewed sense of joy and peace, even when life doesn't make sense. I can say with confidence that Jesus is my passion: the most important thing in my life.

None of these thoughts or scriptures are new to me. I know most people who go to church are familiar with these ideas, but I also know that most people who go to church often fail to fix their eyes on Jesus. I wish I could communicate my heart more effectively, to make others understand what I finally understand, that there really is nothing else worth living for. Hopefully if you are reading this, you are encouraged to get back to seeking God first. "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you." -James 4:8