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King Thamus
12 years ago
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Reflection
As I look back on the past 9 months of my life, I have so much to be thankful for. The memories and friends I've made this year will last a lifetime, and the growth I've experienced this year has set me up for a lifetime of continued growth. While it's hard to process all that I've learned and done this year, it seems necessary to at least review some highlights. In no particular order, here they are:
1) Friends: It might be more fitting to say family. Living with 40 people for 9 months, and doing virtually everything together, builds strong bonds. The 13 other guys in the programs are like brothers to me, and I know at least a few of them will be lifelong friends. Even beyond the IMT program, so many people invested time and energy into my life, and I can't imagine life without these relationships. I am excited to continue these friendships long past any physical connections with Tulsa.
2) Outreaches: Traveling is one of the coolest opportunities in IMT. This year I visited churches and outreach centers in Oklahoma, Missouri, Arkansas, Kansas, Texas, California, Maryland, and Mexico. I've volunteered, and even slept in homeless shelters. I've done drama presentations of the Gospel for people who speak English, and people who don't. I've built relationships with high school students and seen them grow in their passion for God. Something I've experienced a lot in my life, and especially this year, is the privilege of worshipping with different bodies of believers. I find it beautiful to see how God can be glorified through many different traditions and approaches. Getting out of Tulsa has certainly helped me keep God out of any sort of box.
3) VBI: I have never been a fan of school, but somehow this year was different, with the focus less on academics, and more on spiritual growth. All my time in class and studying has produced visible growth in my life. I may not have found the answers to all my questions, but I have found peace and direction for my life. Getting my focus on the Lord has changed my perspective on life in such a refreshing way, and I know as I continue to build my life on the foundation of the Word of God, I will continue to prosper.
4) Personal Growth: Everything about this past year has had its part in my personal growth, but I feel my growth is significant enough to warrant its own bullet. Beyond any practical or spiritual lessons learned this year, I feel like the truth has really taken root in my heart. I have always had all the right answers, but I believe now I can let my life do the talking. God has blessed me so much this year, and I am excited for the privilege to serve Him with all that I have.
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your financial support, your prayers, and your friendship. As I head off to work at Deerfoot Lodge for the summer, you will all be in my prayers. Perhaps I will find time to update this blog again when I am back in Maryland in the Fall. Until then, God Bless!
"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!"
-Philippians 4:4
1) Friends: It might be more fitting to say family. Living with 40 people for 9 months, and doing virtually everything together, builds strong bonds. The 13 other guys in the programs are like brothers to me, and I know at least a few of them will be lifelong friends. Even beyond the IMT program, so many people invested time and energy into my life, and I can't imagine life without these relationships. I am excited to continue these friendships long past any physical connections with Tulsa.
2) Outreaches: Traveling is one of the coolest opportunities in IMT. This year I visited churches and outreach centers in Oklahoma, Missouri, Arkansas, Kansas, Texas, California, Maryland, and Mexico. I've volunteered, and even slept in homeless shelters. I've done drama presentations of the Gospel for people who speak English, and people who don't. I've built relationships with high school students and seen them grow in their passion for God. Something I've experienced a lot in my life, and especially this year, is the privilege of worshipping with different bodies of believers. I find it beautiful to see how God can be glorified through many different traditions and approaches. Getting out of Tulsa has certainly helped me keep God out of any sort of box.
3) VBI: I have never been a fan of school, but somehow this year was different, with the focus less on academics, and more on spiritual growth. All my time in class and studying has produced visible growth in my life. I may not have found the answers to all my questions, but I have found peace and direction for my life. Getting my focus on the Lord has changed my perspective on life in such a refreshing way, and I know as I continue to build my life on the foundation of the Word of God, I will continue to prosper.
4) Personal Growth: Everything about this past year has had its part in my personal growth, but I feel my growth is significant enough to warrant its own bullet. Beyond any practical or spiritual lessons learned this year, I feel like the truth has really taken root in my heart. I have always had all the right answers, but I believe now I can let my life do the talking. God has blessed me so much this year, and I am excited for the privilege to serve Him with all that I have.
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your financial support, your prayers, and your friendship. As I head off to work at Deerfoot Lodge for the summer, you will all be in my prayers. Perhaps I will find time to update this blog again when I am back in Maryland in the Fall. Until then, God Bless!
"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!"
-Philippians 4:4
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Seek First
I like to ponder things. I usually find myself pondering insignificant matters and unanswerable questions. There are, however, the very rare moments when I actually ponder something that is relevant, insightful, and applicable to my life. January 2009 has been full of such epiphanies. In the wake of my annual endeavor to make myself a better person (aka new years), I have become very aware of just how short I fall of God's standard for my life. In my last post, I wrote about my desire to keep my perspective fixed around Christ. As I sought to make this desire a reality, reality itself became my biggest obstacle. How could I ignore the huge question marks that seem to dominate my 2009 calendar? How would I overcome my frustrations with the people around me? Do I really expect my problems to be solved by simply adopting a more spiritual perspective on life?
These questions, among others, led me back to one of my favorite verses: Matthew 6:33. "But seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." What does it mean to really seek God first? This is something I have agreed with in principle for my entire life, but only recently have I been pursuing it. I began to realize all the other things that are important to me, and how frequently I am seeking those things before I seek God. The approval of others, my own comfort, sleep; to list only a few. I am learning the importance of Hebrews 12, to "fix our eyes on Jesus, throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and run with endurance the race marked out for us." As I've practiced throwing off everything, I've experienced such a renewed sense of joy and peace, even when life doesn't make sense. I can say with confidence that Jesus is my passion: the most important thing in my life.
None of these thoughts or scriptures are new to me. I know most people who go to church are familiar with these ideas, but I also know that most people who go to church often fail to fix their eyes on Jesus. I wish I could communicate my heart more effectively, to make others understand what I finally understand, that there really is nothing else worth living for. Hopefully if you are reading this, you are encouraged to get back to seeking God first. "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you." -James 4:8
These questions, among others, led me back to one of my favorite verses: Matthew 6:33. "But seek first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." What does it mean to really seek God first? This is something I have agreed with in principle for my entire life, but only recently have I been pursuing it. I began to realize all the other things that are important to me, and how frequently I am seeking those things before I seek God. The approval of others, my own comfort, sleep; to list only a few. I am learning the importance of Hebrews 12, to "fix our eyes on Jesus, throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and run with endurance the race marked out for us." As I've practiced throwing off everything, I've experienced such a renewed sense of joy and peace, even when life doesn't make sense. I can say with confidence that Jesus is my passion: the most important thing in my life.
None of these thoughts or scriptures are new to me. I know most people who go to church are familiar with these ideas, but I also know that most people who go to church often fail to fix their eyes on Jesus. I wish I could communicate my heart more effectively, to make others understand what I finally understand, that there really is nothing else worth living for. Hopefully if you are reading this, you are encouraged to get back to seeking God first. "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you." -James 4:8
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Perspective
I have always been a fan of New Years resolutions, and while I have plenty lined up for 2009, they have recently become lesser priorities. I like to set measurable goals for myself, with the noble intention of improving as a person, and more importantly, growing closer to God. In the process of pursuing these goals, however, I’ve found it far too easy to get caught up with the less significant objectives, while losing focus on God. I strive to learn more about the Bible, but am I becoming more like Christ, or merely becoming more qualified to boast in my knowledge? I struggle to empty my mind of impurity, but do I remember to fill it with things that are excellent and praiseworthy? I seek daily time with God, but do I treasure these times, or am I just avoiding the familiar shame of complacency? This year I am still resolving to change, but with a new perspective.
This new perspective has been fueled by my recent review of CS Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia. Throughout this series, we see time and again the sad reality that not everyone will believe, or choose to live for the truth. The courage of the children in each of the stories in the face of opposition is inspiring. They (usually) have a better grasp than most of the significance of their cause, and refuse to compromise because they know there is nothing more important. Do I fail to share their passion because I don’t live in a fantasy world? Or perhaps I have spent too long in our society’s fantasy world, and let my passion slip away. Who am I letting dictate my priorities? I am convinced that if I truly believe what the Bible says, then it will radically change the way I live. My priorities will be aligned with God’s priorities, and whatever desires I have apart from that will seem much less important. If there is anything holding me back from living the only life that I know I was created to live, then it only makes sense that I will do whatever it takes to throw off those hindrances. I am sick of justifying mediocrity in my life. I want to turn my eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face, and allow the things of earth to grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.
This new perspective has been fueled by my recent review of CS Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia. Throughout this series, we see time and again the sad reality that not everyone will believe, or choose to live for the truth. The courage of the children in each of the stories in the face of opposition is inspiring. They (usually) have a better grasp than most of the significance of their cause, and refuse to compromise because they know there is nothing more important. Do I fail to share their passion because I don’t live in a fantasy world? Or perhaps I have spent too long in our society’s fantasy world, and let my passion slip away. Who am I letting dictate my priorities? I am convinced that if I truly believe what the Bible says, then it will radically change the way I live. My priorities will be aligned with God’s priorities, and whatever desires I have apart from that will seem much less important. If there is anything holding me back from living the only life that I know I was created to live, then it only makes sense that I will do whatever it takes to throw off those hindrances. I am sick of justifying mediocrity in my life. I want to turn my eyes upon Jesus, look full in his wonderful face, and allow the things of earth to grow strangely dim in the light of his glory and grace.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
"God is God"
The other day I read something written by a friend, and while I may not agree with all of his conclusions, I really appreciate the questions he asks, and his desire to find the truth. Enjoy.
"God is God"
Why are some healed and some not healed?
I'm sure many within the christian faith who believe that healing is something that still happens today have asked themselves this question... probably all who believe in it have. I was reading in Matthew and something I noticed is that Jesus never healed simply for the sake of healing. There was always something deeper going on. Not only that, it only ever brought "fame" to him. His name is the only one by which anyone can be saved so that makes sense, but still it's not for the sake of just the healing. It's just another way Father wants to draw us to him and if it doesn't lead to that end then ultimately what's the point?
I used to struggle so much with this question. People would tell me that it's a promise of God (healing) so it has to work every time! So I was very confused and not impressed when it wouldn't work... and I would watch those same people who stood in such confidence proclaiming the promise from behind the pulpit look some suffering person in eye promising that their pain would be gone if only they could have faith.... This suffering person that would do anything to know how to make that faith work.... and so they look that person in the eye and say "brother, you just keep believing for your healing and I'm gonna do the same thing. I truly believe you are going to be healed! Amen!" They may respond with half a smile and see some ray of hope because of the display of confidence before them, but we don't walk home with them. Many times we don't ever pray for them or think about them again. If we do it fades with time.... and they walk away having needed a true encounter with God's love and instead they get a Jesus high for a second, a little false hope, and better reason to believe that God doesn't really care about them.
I'm sure the way this sounds makes it seem as though I'm against praying for people's healing or something for the reason that you can't know if it's going to work every time but that's not it at all. If you witnessed thousands of confirmed healings at the tips of your fingers and later learned that not one of those people went to be with their Father in heaven, then what kind of sense of accomplishment could you possibly retain.... none I would hope. If you pay attention to the theme of the Bible and things that happen today that we would consider paranormal in regards to christianity, I think you will see that our Father only ever wants our hearts and if anything gets in the way of that, He does everything he can to get rid of it.
I do believe in healing, but not as a right that I have obtained by professing to be a follower of Christ. I believe that that it's a gift that God distributes as he pleases and we have no right to challenge or question why or when because the one fact remains that we so often forget... he is GOD! He doesn't answer to us, we answer to him.
I have never been healed, never spoken in tongues, never had anything really crazy like that happen to me, but my relationship with my Father doesn't suffer for it, although it used to. I would come to God in frustration saying things like, "You promised! You have to! Your word says you will!" so arrogantly arguing my case before HIS throne. I felt entitled to those things... but never had i considered how that made God feel.
I can't imagine how my spouse would feel if I felt entitled to the outward displays of her love... if I felt like she "had to" cook for me, that she "had to" kiss me, that "had to" keep the house clean. How used she would feel.... how unappreciated and unimportant. I wouldn't question my wife's love for me if I came home to dirty house one day. The same reason I don't question God when I pray for someone who doesn't get healed. I'm content to let God be God and continue love his people the best way I know how. I know that God loves his people more than I could ever have the ability to. Why should I think that God has failed them or me when I don't see something that I think I should? There is no reward for a certain number of healings, or baptisms in the Holy Spirit, but God will not overlook one single act of love towards one of his children.
I believe that God is moved by our hearts and NOT correct protocol. If it was only correct protocol and phrasing it would be nothing more than casting spells. The power of God lies in his infinite love. Everything He DOES is a result of the love that HE IS. I haven't arrived. I don't know anything aside from what He has chosen to show me. I pray that I don't speak my opinions, but the heart of Father.
The Father's love never lets go.
"God is God"
Why are some healed and some not healed?
I'm sure many within the christian faith who believe that healing is something that still happens today have asked themselves this question... probably all who believe in it have. I was reading in Matthew and something I noticed is that Jesus never healed simply for the sake of healing. There was always something deeper going on. Not only that, it only ever brought "fame" to him. His name is the only one by which anyone can be saved so that makes sense, but still it's not for the sake of just the healing. It's just another way Father wants to draw us to him and if it doesn't lead to that end then ultimately what's the point?
I used to struggle so much with this question. People would tell me that it's a promise of God (healing) so it has to work every time! So I was very confused and not impressed when it wouldn't work... and I would watch those same people who stood in such confidence proclaiming the promise from behind the pulpit look some suffering person in eye promising that their pain would be gone if only they could have faith.... This suffering person that would do anything to know how to make that faith work.... and so they look that person in the eye and say "brother, you just keep believing for your healing and I'm gonna do the same thing. I truly believe you are going to be healed! Amen!" They may respond with half a smile and see some ray of hope because of the display of confidence before them, but we don't walk home with them. Many times we don't ever pray for them or think about them again. If we do it fades with time.... and they walk away having needed a true encounter with God's love and instead they get a Jesus high for a second, a little false hope, and better reason to believe that God doesn't really care about them.
I'm sure the way this sounds makes it seem as though I'm against praying for people's healing or something for the reason that you can't know if it's going to work every time but that's not it at all. If you witnessed thousands of confirmed healings at the tips of your fingers and later learned that not one of those people went to be with their Father in heaven, then what kind of sense of accomplishment could you possibly retain.... none I would hope. If you pay attention to the theme of the Bible and things that happen today that we would consider paranormal in regards to christianity, I think you will see that our Father only ever wants our hearts and if anything gets in the way of that, He does everything he can to get rid of it.
I do believe in healing, but not as a right that I have obtained by professing to be a follower of Christ. I believe that that it's a gift that God distributes as he pleases and we have no right to challenge or question why or when because the one fact remains that we so often forget... he is GOD! He doesn't answer to us, we answer to him.
I have never been healed, never spoken in tongues, never had anything really crazy like that happen to me, but my relationship with my Father doesn't suffer for it, although it used to. I would come to God in frustration saying things like, "You promised! You have to! Your word says you will!" so arrogantly arguing my case before HIS throne. I felt entitled to those things... but never had i considered how that made God feel.
I can't imagine how my spouse would feel if I felt entitled to the outward displays of her love... if I felt like she "had to" cook for me, that she "had to" kiss me, that "had to" keep the house clean. How used she would feel.... how unappreciated and unimportant. I wouldn't question my wife's love for me if I came home to dirty house one day. The same reason I don't question God when I pray for someone who doesn't get healed. I'm content to let God be God and continue love his people the best way I know how. I know that God loves his people more than I could ever have the ability to. Why should I think that God has failed them or me when I don't see something that I think I should? There is no reward for a certain number of healings, or baptisms in the Holy Spirit, but God will not overlook one single act of love towards one of his children.
I believe that God is moved by our hearts and NOT correct protocol. If it was only correct protocol and phrasing it would be nothing more than casting spells. The power of God lies in his infinite love. Everything He DOES is a result of the love that HE IS. I haven't arrived. I don't know anything aside from what He has chosen to show me. I pray that I don't speak my opinions, but the heart of Father.
The Father's love never lets go.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
The Learning Curve
I know very little about psychology, but bear with me. Basically, the learning curve measures capacity to learn vs. time. A steep learning curve means you can learn a lot quickly. A flat learning curve means it takes you forever to learn very little. Typically, people learn a lot when they are young, when there is the most to be learned. As time passes, they begin to lose interest in learning, or perhaps they simply run out of things to learn. Either way, the curve tends to flatten. I don't really know what I'm talking about.
What I do know is that I am at Bible school because I want to learn. I want to learn as much as possible, and make the most of my time here. I have been guilty of sitting through "boring" classes without even trying to receive from the teacher. While I may have accidentally learned something during one of these classes, I do not recommend this approach. I've been discovering the importance of seeking God in every area of my life, no matter how seemingly insignificant, and I have definitely learned a lot.
I have learned new perspectives and insight into the Bible, but I've also been learning what it means to live for Christ. Living according to scripture can seem overwhelming at times, but Jesus did say his yoke is easy, and I've found it always pays off. As I've sought to keep an open mind and an open heart, I've realized a lot of things in my life that could be improved. I've been taken out of my comfort zone and challenged in ways that made my pride and arrogance come right to the surface. Through all this I have been learning patience, perseverance, and humility. It isn't always easy, but I am so grateful.
A change of direction and a quick note about myself: I question everything. Coming to Tulsa and encountering new doctrine and theology has not been easy. I came to Tulsa with lots of questions, and now I have even more. I will continue to seek the answers, but I recently received some good advice. Rather than focusing completely on the things I don't understand, why not pour all my energy into living out what I do understand? I have become a very proficient skeptic, but have I grown in my love for others? I know that love is the most important thing I will ever know, so why does it take a backseat to these less significant questions? Like I said, I'm learning.
I have spent too much of my life sitting on the comfortable complacency of the flat curve. I want to be climbing up the steepest part of the curve, reaching for new levels of knowledge and growth. I want to know that I am making the most of my life, my gifts, my opportunities. So that's what I'm going to do.
"Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up."
-1 Corinthians 8:1
What I do know is that I am at Bible school because I want to learn. I want to learn as much as possible, and make the most of my time here. I have been guilty of sitting through "boring" classes without even trying to receive from the teacher. While I may have accidentally learned something during one of these classes, I do not recommend this approach. I've been discovering the importance of seeking God in every area of my life, no matter how seemingly insignificant, and I have definitely learned a lot.
I have learned new perspectives and insight into the Bible, but I've also been learning what it means to live for Christ. Living according to scripture can seem overwhelming at times, but Jesus did say his yoke is easy, and I've found it always pays off. As I've sought to keep an open mind and an open heart, I've realized a lot of things in my life that could be improved. I've been taken out of my comfort zone and challenged in ways that made my pride and arrogance come right to the surface. Through all this I have been learning patience, perseverance, and humility. It isn't always easy, but I am so grateful.
A change of direction and a quick note about myself: I question everything. Coming to Tulsa and encountering new doctrine and theology has not been easy. I came to Tulsa with lots of questions, and now I have even more. I will continue to seek the answers, but I recently received some good advice. Rather than focusing completely on the things I don't understand, why not pour all my energy into living out what I do understand? I have become a very proficient skeptic, but have I grown in my love for others? I know that love is the most important thing I will ever know, so why does it take a backseat to these less significant questions? Like I said, I'm learning.
I have spent too much of my life sitting on the comfortable complacency of the flat curve. I want to be climbing up the steepest part of the curve, reaching for new levels of knowledge and growth. I want to know that I am making the most of my life, my gifts, my opportunities. So that's what I'm going to do.
"Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up."
-1 Corinthians 8:1
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Thanksgiving
"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."
-1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. I don't even know what I'm going to do next year. As Christians, we always talk about seeking God's will for our lives, following God's path, doing God's work. This is all well and good, but I have found it can be too easy to sit and wait for some divine revelation about the future, and miss God's plan for me right now. It's easy to be thankful on Thanksgiving, but why do we need a holiday to count our blessings? I know I have so much to be thankful for, and even when life seems rough, I am so blessed. Give thanks in ALL circumstances. It seems pretty straightforward, and if it's God's will for me today, that's what I'm going to do.
Thanks to all my family and friends for being amazing. I love you all.
-1 Thessalonians 5:16-18
I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. I don't even know what I'm going to do next year. As Christians, we always talk about seeking God's will for our lives, following God's path, doing God's work. This is all well and good, but I have found it can be too easy to sit and wait for some divine revelation about the future, and miss God's plan for me right now. It's easy to be thankful on Thanksgiving, but why do we need a holiday to count our blessings? I know I have so much to be thankful for, and even when life seems rough, I am so blessed. Give thanks in ALL circumstances. It seems pretty straightforward, and if it's God's will for me today, that's what I'm going to do.
Thanks to all my family and friends for being amazing. I love you all.
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